Breaking Barriers May 18, 2009

This is a post from my facebook site, that I guess just really started this new life in Christ I have at the moment and thought it should be the first post on this site...lol. So enjoy! and comment! :)

So I am one of those kids that sit in church on Sunday mornings and sometimes sings along during praise and worship, hands chilling in my pockets, I am one of the quiet ones, I don’t sing even though my heart is thrashing around in my chest just to be let out and praise God. Sadly, I try to contain it... as though everyone is watching me and I don’t much like to be the centre of attention.
The past few weeks I have been feeling all over the place, especially due to HSC, but recently I have seen how many amazing things I have in my life, I have the best friends in the world (not even joking), I am healthy(to an extent), I have a family, I am nearly finished school, I had the opportunity to travel over seas, I have Jesus.Today during worship I just lifted my hands to God, thanking him for everything, the next thing I knew I was crying, (this in itself is a rare occurrence for me in public) not just watering eyes... I was shaking, gasping for breath type crying... I didn’t realise/acknowledge until that point how incredible my life actually is, God has blessed me so much...i continually looked at the negative pieces of my puzzle (yeah I do have my fair share of bad days and horrible problems as well) Music finished and three of my best friends just came and held me... I couldn’t breathe, I was so incredibly emotional and in awe. I knew I had great friends, I knew God was incredible I knew life rocked... but that moment completely changed me, everything was clear...As soon as I lifted my hands in praise a weight was just taken off my shoulders, I felt so free, everything seemed to fall in to place. Later our Pastor stood at the front and asked me to come forward so he could pray for me, he started praying about specific things that i was really struggling with, God just told him everything and again i broke down, until today i was feeling so far from God, i was feeling as though he wasnt listenining, i underestimated him.
Today walls within me were broken, and its awesome! God is so good.After church I was standing outside with one of my greatest friends, and she was just like ‘Sarah what’s going on? Your Aura has totally changed! Ha-ha’ and that’s exactly how it felt... I walked into church that morning just my normal self thinking about school the next day ehhhhhh and other trivial things, I walked out realising how much some things just don’t matter and how some things are so incredibly important, and the fact we tend to focus on all the wrong things.

These are some things that have become so clear today, and I just need to share them!
- by putting my fear aside stepping out and praising God I was blessed, my anger and frustration were taken and I was able to just express myself freely and give God the praise he deserves.
-crying in the arms of others, just letting things out on friends, is okay. Its one of the most incredible feelings and in a way brings joy to both parties.
-I have the most incredible friends in the world, seriously, they would support me and help me through anything, even if it wasn’t something they ever wanted to do. Friends of all ages, They are the type of friends who would give up something important to them just to be with you when you were hurting and know how to have fun no matter what. These friends have been there when those I thought were friends had just walked out when I didn’t compromise my faith.
-even if i was feeling absolutly horrible at any point in time, you just need to remember life is so much more than one day, situatiions sometimes suck but look for what God wants you to do in any given situation... there will always be something.
- I realised that Yes, school is important. And doing well is something I need to keep my eyes focused on... but school is not everything. If school work got in the way of my relationships with God or friends I would sacrifice school any day. Relationships are a huge part of my life and I would much rather be investing time in them than spending hours studying an English text or solving maths equations.
-I have realised that God puts certain people in our lives when we need them most and lets them work in our lives, I have also realised God takes people away from our lives for periods of time, weeks, months, years, and that also is a good thing, even though it hurts so much that they are no longer physically present, you can’t hang out with them or just chat, God uses this time to grow you in other ways, and I feel as though he uses it in my life to help me to grow as an individual and not just a branch off a tree. He uses that time to let me appreciate their influence, learn from what they’ve taught and move forward, sharing with other people things you’ve learnt , I’m not talking about completely barring off the person, but not being dependant on them, to build up relationships equally with others, because as they have been an influence in your life, you can use what you have learnt and be an influence in someone else’s life.
-Things don't ever stay the same, things change... it sucks heaps... but there is no way your going to grow if you staying in one spot.-Accepting Jesus into my life is the best thing that has ever happened to me, I have lost many friends by doing this, but I have gained so much more.
-No matter what happens in this life, I will stand strong in my faith.